You're stronger than you think (but not how you think)

I got an email from a student the other day that stopped me in my tracks.

Not because it was dramatic or urgent, but because it was so honest. So real. It reminded me of something I've been thinking about a lot lately: what we think strength is versus what it actually is.

Planks had been a part of this student’s regular routine. They felt their core was solid. And then they tried our SAAL yoga version of Dead Bug’s pose in one of our sessions (note: “pose” instead of “exercise” here. The fundamental difference between these two classifications is paramount to truly understanding the impact of yoga vs. traditional exercise. If you’d like to read more on this topic, head on over here and here). 

Dead Bug pose, a progressive series of movement, can look deceptively simple, and it was here that this student realized their abs weren't as strong as they'd believed.

Their response?:

"I got tired part way through and could feel I was starting to use my back muscles. So I went back to it the next day and now have a more limited set (same moves) until I get stronger."

That sentence right there? That's the practice.

The Power of Curiosity

Here's what most fitness culture gets wrong: it treats the discovery of a limitation as a failure. You couldn't hold the plank long enough. You couldn't keep up with the class. You couldn't do the full version of the pose.

But yoga—real yoga, the kind that changes your relationship with your body—treats that moment of discovery as data. Not failure. Not weakness. Just information your body has been trying to tell you, and you're finally listening.

This student discovered their abs weren't doing what they thought they were. That their upper back had become "slouchy." That they had an anterior pelvic tilt they hadn't fully noticed before.

And instead of being discouraged, they got curious. They scaled back. They showed up the next day. They made Dead Bug part of their daily "wake up my abs" routine.

That's not giving up. That's getting smarter.

The Mirror That Yoga Holds Up

One of the things this student wrote really struck me: 

"The upper thoracic stuff has made me even more aware of how 'slouchy' I have become. Even the Warrior poses require a stretch to keep my arms in the same plane as my body."

Yoga has this way of being a mirror. Not the kind of mirror that judges or criticizes, but the kind that simply reflects what is. And sometimes what it reflects surprises us.

You might think you're standing tall until you try to lift your arms overhead and realize your shoulders don't want to go there. You might think your hips are fine until you step into Warrior II and feel how much effort it takes just to keep your pelvis from tilting forward.

These aren't problems. They're revelations.

Once you see what's actually happening in your body, you can do something about it. You can meet yourself where you are instead of where you think you should be.

Precision Over Power

Here's what I want you to understand about core strength, because this student's experience with Dead Bug illustrates it perfectly:

Strong isn't just about how long you can hold a plank or how many crunches you can do. Strong is about precision. It's about your deep stabilizing muscles doing their job so your back doesn't have to compensate.

Dead Bug looks easy. You are on your back, moving opposite arm and leg in a controlled way. You can skate by with minimal effort when practicing this pose. Or, it can be one of the most challenging pose progressions for your core that you’ve ever encountered. Where the rubber meets the road here is if you think you are really “in” it, yet your awareness isn't really “in” it, your deep abdominal muscles aren't firing properly, and your back will try to take over. You will feel it, and not where you were hoping.

When this student felt fatigue and noticed their back muscles kicking in, they could have pushed through. They could have told themselves to just work harder. Instead, they backed off, regrouped, and came back the next day with a more limited set.

Now that is strength. The kind that lasts.

The Practice That Stays With You

Here's something else this student shared that I want you to sit with for a moment:

"I have come to really enjoy your writings and your spoken word during the classes. I find the things you say are with me throughout the day (in a good way). It's making me feel more aware all day long."

This is what I mean when I say yoga isn't just about what happens on the mat.

When you start to pay attention to how your abs engage in Dead Bug, you start to notice how you hold your center when you're sitting at your desk. When you become aware of your slouch in a Warrior pose, you catch yourself rounding forward when you're standing in line at the grocery store.

The practice doesn't stay contained in those 30 or 60 minutes. It ripples outward. It becomes the way you move through your day, the way you notice your posture, the way you respond when something feels off in your body.

One student told me they now pause before picking up something heavy and thinks about their alignment first. Another said they catch themselves breathing more fully throughout the day. 

That's the practice staying with you. That's the awareness you cultivate on the mat showing up everywhere else.

The Unexpected Gift

And then there was this:

"I have had a couple of days where I was not sure how class would go given my back was feeling weak/sore. And surprise to me, the back pain was gone at the end of class. All of the stretching I normally do has never resulted in that."

This happens more often than you'd think, and it surprises people every time.

You come to class feeling tight, maybe a little sore, unsure if movement is even a good idea. And then you move mindfully, with awareness, with the right kind of support and engagement. And something shifts.

It's not magic. It's what happens when your body gets what it actually needs instead of what you think it needs.

Stretching alone won't fix back pain if the underlying issue is weakness or instability. But when you combine intelligent movement with core engagement, with postural awareness, with breath, suddenly your body has the tools to feel better.

Not because you forced it. Because you gave it the conditions to heal.

What Real Strength Looks Like

So let me bring this back to where we started: what strength actually is.

It's not how hard you can push. It's not about grinding through fatigue or ignoring the signals your body is sending you.

Real strength is showing up the next day after realizing something was harder than you expected. It's scaling back when you need to so you can build a foundation that will hold. It's noticing when your back is compensating and making the choice to engage your core instead.

Real strength is being willing to see yourself clearly, even when what you see isn't what you hoped for.

And here's the beautiful part: when you approach your practice this way, you don't just get stronger. You get more aware. More connected. More present in your own body.

The things you learn on the mat start showing up in how you stand, how you sit, how you move throughout your day. The awareness you cultivate doesn't just make you better at yoga. It makes you better at being in your body.

Keep Going

If you're reading this and recognizing yourself in this student's words—if you've discovered that something you thought was strong isn't quite there yet, or if you're realizing your posture isn't what you'd hoped, or if you've been surprised by what your body is telling you—I want you to know this:

You're exactly where you need to be.

The awareness is the beginning. The willingness to adjust, to scale back, to meet yourself where you are instead of where you think you should be.

That, my friend, is the practice.

And if you keep showing up, if you keep listening, if you keep making those small, conscious adjustments day after day, you won't just get stronger.

You'll understand what strength actually means.

This student ended their message with this:

"So anyway, still at it and hopeful about the future."

Still at it. Hopeful.

That's all any of us can do. And honestly? That's everything.